Do you know where your bananas come from?

If you are what you eat, then you’re definitely a member of the LOHAS market if you’re downing a Dole organic banana (and know what we know about the Dole Organic Program).

Some of our recent work has brought us deep into the mindset of the “Lifestyles of Health and Sustainability” segment and there’s at least one thing we’re sure of – transparency is everything. 

And that can drive some companies bananas. But, it seems, not Dole. Dole has created a site where its customers can enter their fruit’s 3-digit sticker code and find out exactly who, what, and where their bananas come from. Country, farm, certifications, pictures… everything. They go a step further by outlining their actions and intentions to improve their leadership in organic agriculture.

How’s that for up-front and honest? Makes me want to go buy a Dole banana.

Yep, we’re a Mac shop

WWDC 07 had a special guest appearance… “PC” (from the “Get a Mac” commercials) got a great laugh as he announced he was Steve Jobs and declared the end of Apple.

Uh oh, someone’s going to get in trouble…

Wow, this is something you want to avoid at all costs.

See that big orange AT&T / Samsung ad? I mean, how could you miss it, really.

Most of the pages I go to on Wired.com has that flash ad that just shows up and covers a large section of the page. There is no close button or any other way to remove the ad; it even covers up the global navigation on the home page…  ultra-bad juju.

It is making some folks pretty peeved – read some of their verbatim comments below: they are talking boycotting both AT&T and Wired.

   

Can’t close advert with either firefox or internet explorer – better fix it wired
   
It’s pretty poor representation for your brand. Totally unusable.

   

AT&T
   
last time i visit wired for a while, whos with me on the boycott?

   

Boycott AT&T
   
Seriously, WTF? Wired should be able to do better than this crap.

Good thing Tony Soprano isn’t around anymore, or a boycott would be the least of their worries.

In Which We Suspect Count Chocula.

Our friends at Boing-Boing note the passing of Pamela Low, who created the flavored coating of Cap’n Crunch
cereal.

They also note a disturbing design trend…or is it something worse?

Here we have Original Cap’n Crunch:

This Cap’n keeps it real. He’s got his sails set, a fetching first mate, and plenty of supplies laid in for the journey. Note the heavy-lidded eyes. (Perhaps a port of call in Jamaica?)

Here’s 1970′s Full Color Cap’n:

Actually, it’s his French counterpart, Le Capitain Monsieur Crunch D’Bouche.
Eyes a little more open, but  no more girlfriend.
(Love, she is fickle.)

Now, let’s meet today’s Captain Crunch.

AIEEEEEEEEEEE!! Look, kids! It’s our friend "No Time To Sleep, The Illuminati Control Everything, Man!" Captain Crunch.

Can’t you just picture this meeting?

CLIENT:  "We need a vibrant Cap’n Crunch. A real go-getter. A  post 9/11 Cap’n Crunch, ready to defend our shipping lanes in the War-On-Terror ."

DESIGNER: "Sigh." (Dies a little inside.)

Would you let Captain Tweaker near your kids?

Perhaps he’s just stressed out about the competition:

We’re on to you, Chocula.

Spelling bee champ MORE annoying than you might’ve assumed

Spellingbee jerk – Click Here for more great videos and pictures!
Courtesy of Gawker comes a classic example of why we media train our PR clients. Although an argument could be made that CNN’s Kiran Chetry is the one who needs a little more training. After all, she let an thirteen-year-old homeschooler take control of an interview. Damn kids!

Update: Our friends at SFist have an update on the Bay Area champs’ home field activities as well. Of course, throwing out the first pitch is not nearly as entertaining as smacking down a CNN anchorbot.

Galaxy Wars

Apparently Mortar is in the throes of an internal battle for space.  To counter Account Services’ imperialistic cubicle-grab, the Creative Department has established a bulkhead by welcoming three new talents to the team.  Thank GOD one of them has considerable experience battling the Dark Side, or else the fight may have been lost.

Interactive associate creative director Chris Inclenrock hails from Lucasfilm, where he was responsible for the development and art direction of all websites including starwars.com.  Most recently, he was the Director of Interactivity at Francis Ford Coppola presents, where he was perhaps best known for discovering the secret key to the private wine cellar and drinking his way through much of the famous director’s old and rare vintages. 

David Myatt, associate creative director, brings more than 15 years of experience in the creation and design of advertising and branding to the job.  Rumor has it that he can’t spell, but no matter—he’s an art director, and a darn good one.  A fine artist cursed with the brain of a marketer, David has worked for RBG Marketing, TMP Worldwide, and Austin Knight, and has solved the toughest of creative marketing problems for industry leaders like Time Warner, Geico, Nike and AT&T Wireless.

As for designer Michelle Kim—not only has she traveled the globe and then some, but the girl has one unbelievable portfolio.  She’s studied at RISD, Corcoran College of Art and Kenyon College, and holds a second degree in Anthropology from UVa.  Before discovering her true calling, she lived in Paris, taught Kindergarten in Seattle, and flew fighter kites in Bombay.  Oh yeah, did we tell you that she also spent considerable time studying with the Jedi masters?

Let’s Give Something Back.

You know, we have a lot of fun here on the Mortarblog, but we’re about giving back, too. Take a moment out of your busy day and spend some time with comedian Ricky Gervais as he raises awareness of poverty in Kenya. It’s not like the usual pitches; you know the ones, they claim to be about helping people, but they’re really just cheap, shoddy vehicles for self-promotion. No, we’re not into that. We’re about helping people. And so is Stephen Merchant. He appears in this video because he cares about the state of the world we share, not because he needs to raise his own profile. Or sell Daz Detergent.  Celebrity chef Jamie Oliver is on board; he’s about solving problems, too. Not selling cookbooks. Because what could be more cynical than that?

Selling bloody cookbooks in Kenya? That would just be wrong. But we’re not about wrong. We’re about brotherhood. We’ve got Geldof, for goodness’ sakes. What more do you need?  If you don’t well up when a Kenyan villager gives Gervais his most prized possession, your very soul is in peril. Or, you’re out of onion rings. Check it out, won’t you? When you give back, everyone’s a winner.

Further evidence: print classifieds join the dodo

Bay Area realtor and blogger, Chris Iverson, (3 Oceans via SFist) offers up anecdotal evidence that newspaper classifieds are quickly becoming even less relevant than Dubya’s new "climate change" plan.

Iverson gives the following example:

I ran ads in the Palo Alto Weekly and the Open Homes sections of the San Mateo County Times (local paper) and San Francisco Chronicle. And the results? Out of 52 groups over two weekends, a total of zero came because they saw an ad in a newspaper.

Meanwhile, the listing for the house on my website has been visited 101 times, and the virtual tour on the MLS (Multiple Listings Service) and other online outlets has received over 1600 hits from nearly 200 visitors.

This is only one example (he has others) but, if you’re a classified ads salesperson, you might want to spiff up your resume.

They’re all going to laugh at you

“The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.”

After several minutes of furious Googling, it’s unclear whether Oscar Wilde actually spoke the above quote or if it’s just from the Monty Python skit but, either way, it sums up the current Web video phenomenon pretty frickin’ well.

Go viral video PR!

Case in point, the Boston Pops’ current promotional contest. The Pops are running an online (you can also send in VHS tapes if you’re still living in the 20th century) contest called PopSearch. Yes, American Idol is now influencing respectable cultural institutions. The winner gets 5,000 samoleons and a chance to sing with one of the foremost interpreters of John Phillip Sousa’s oevre. If you want in, you’ve got to submit your video by 11:59 p.m. tonight. Get singing!

The contestant featured below is San Francisco’s own Aaron Drake.

iWOWZA

Apple’s famously recognizable silhouettes are making their way from brand to brand and has now jumped into a new industry: sex toys. Check out the iGasm.

C’mon Apple, talk about giving the world some leverage with a great idea like silhouettes and a simple lowercase “i.” 

G-rated companies like ivillage, itools and ifilm have already showed themselves to the public. But this new ‘iGASM’ may spark an entire new trend in the X-rated community with x-rated, sexual jargon beginning with that famous, influential baby “i.”

Who knows, the new iGasm may bump up sales for Apple in the UK.

Do we see a new X-rated brand identity for Apple in the future? Probably not, but one never knows what Steve Jobs and his brilliant team of innovators are cooking up.